Monday, June 11, 2007

The Five Best Relevant and Current Bands We Currently Listen To EVER!

Yes, I know the titles are getting a sort of desperate stink about them. They strive and strive again to some how end in “EVER!” Eventually I foresee a post entitled The Five Best Things I’ve Ever Done With Broccoli Florets And Vegetarian Meatloaf EVER! Then you will know that the shark has been jumped. At that point, please read no more. Whatever coolness our powers combined can muster will have been drained onto the scorched plains of a sarcastic Ilium. We will utilize smileys. The very Earth will cry out for us to stop, but me and GSR will continue to put out complete crap. You should not support this behavior.

Instead, you should think of clever segues from one random subject to another equally random and totally unrelated subject OR listen to one of these five bands who are still currently relevant. And who doesn’t like relevancy? I never thought I would feel as socially irrelevant as I did with last week’s post.


1) The Black Keys

No, they are nothing like The White Stripes. It is an unfortunate similarity in names as one band is the last gasp of testosterone being unabashedly involved in the making of music and the other is a gimmick that should have died long ago.

The Black Keys are everything I don’t hate about rock. They don’t have long and boring neo-hair-metal guitar solos, they don’t have 18 different vocal tracks, and they don’t have any digital studio crap at all. They are simply the best rock band to come around in a long damn time.


Somehow they avoided the Nirvana scream and the Pearljam mumble that seem to have infected the last two decades. Instead, they manage to evoke something along the lines of the Kinks covering the less moronic aspects of Led Zepplin covering Mississippi John Hurt. What does that mean? I'm not even sure. I think it means you need to put down the Now That’s What I call Music 47! at the music store and pick up Magic Potion. Plug in your iPod (as you invariably will own an iPod, you bunch of goddamn sheep) and feel the lame washed out of you by strange desires and elevators.

Punk ass bitches.


-Okay, first let me say "Baaaaahhhhhhh." The iPod is the greatest modern invention (EVER!), but we can save that for another post. Second, The Black Keys are fucking awesome. Chulahoma was the first album that I heard, and that led me to go find everything that I could by the band. If you need a sample let me know as I should be able to get you one pretty easily.



2) Modest Mouse


This is a group that has only recently gotten popular, but they have been around for a while. The gripe against them used to be that they had this strangely dissonant music paired with the lead singers dissonant and atonal voice. Sometimes it sounded like he was wailing with excitement, and other times he would drop to a near mumble, but the early albums only appealed to a small population.


Things really changed with Good News For People Who Like Bad News when they released an album that had some catchy hooks and softer melodies paired wiht the same dissonant voice. This combination on a song like "Float On" seemed to catch a lot of people's attention, and the album as a whole was great. The newest album We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank is a continuation of what they started on "Good News..." Whether you are an original fan or a new fan the combination of music and lyrics doesn't disappoint. (p.s. to Casey - you owe me a "thank you" for resisting the urge to steal Cross Canadian Ragweed from you).


-Right, I'm going to recommend the Ragweed to this list. I probably would had I not made the qualifier of relevance a criterion of this bunch. Not that they are irrelevant, but I doubt that their relevancy would mean much here. Anyway, Modest Mouse rocks. I saw these guys a couple years ago (holy shit, that was five years ago) in San Francisco and I have to say you need to see them live. The experience elucidates a lot of the attitudes that are only hinted at in their amazing studio work. Still, I like them.


Anyway, for the next contestant, I nominate:


3) Nickelback


That was for you Jill and Janet.


The real deal:


Queens of the Stoneage


I love this band. They have just enough weirdness not to lose a rocker and just enough rock not to lose the indie kids. They're also fun. I know that fun is not what a person is supposed to look for outside the genres of cartoon hip-hop and pop, but I can't think of a more apt descriptor of their songs. The songs have a tendency to be about fucking, drugs, and irresponsible drinking. I think that about sums them up, really.


I should mention that for all their bacchus tendencies, they never get stupid. They never get crunk. They never turn into Nickelback (I shudder) and they never descend into the bullshit angst that passes for thought in our modern times.


If you disagree with me on this, you are wrong.




-I'm not going to disagree on this one. I love Queens of the Stoneage. I was hooked when their first big track got released and it had Dave Grohl on drums. He is one of the few drummers that actually separates himself from the others, and the rest of the band kicked ass on the first track too. They have since gone on to have some consistently good albums, and I can't for the life of me figure out why they don't get more airplay.




Oh yeah - I think you need to apologize to Janet and Jill. There is no way ladies with such good taste like Nickelback....right?




4) Arcade Fire




Why do I have the sneaking suspicion that this could be our first disagreement?




This band kicked down the doors with their first major album Funeral, and then made their fans wait a solid few years before getting the next big release. Man was it worth the wait.




The current album (in heavy rotation with anyone who is cool) is called Neon Bible. The thing I like most about this album is that it is an honest to goodness album. It has a beginning, middle, and an end - and it is clear the band spent some time thinking about song order, tone, and theme. On top of that, the songs kick ass. You should go right now and listen to (Antichrist Television Blues).





-Well...

At least you didn't say The White Stripes.

And I'm out.

131 comments:

Anonymous said...

First of all, I hope you punched yourself in the face after typing the phrase "vegetarian meatloaf".

Second, Queens of the Stone Age = awesome. I haven't listened to Arcade Fire, but I'll take your advice and find myself some.

My submission for #5: Tool. Their music, from the lyrics to the style, has been consistently setting faces on fire since their inception. Their latest, '10,000 Days', didn't seem to get much press, but I thought it was mui bueno. I'll also throw Foo Fighters out there, since you made a Grohl reference.

Rock Hammer said...

Awesome. Goddamn right about the Tool. And the face punching.

m.a. said...

The Arcade Fire is cool. Who cares if Casey doesn't like them?

I think that the Raveonettes are relevant. Any band who records an entire album in Bflat gets my vote.

I dare you two to disagree.

Claven said...

I can't get into the Arcade Fire because I automatically feel like I'm listening to a soundtrack to a John Hughes movie whenever I hear them. That's not necessarilly a bad thing. It just distracts me to the point that I'm humming Simple Minds or the Hoodoo Gurus when I'm supposed to be listening to this group of Canadians.

I can second The Raveonettes. Although I'm only cool enough to own Pretty in Black.

My number five is easily My Morning Jacket. I put Okonokos in the live album territory of Springsteen's 75-85 and Ben Harper's Live From Mars. Listen to Dondante on the second CD while driving somewhere fast at night.

JillWrites said...

I have so much to say about this post except right now I am pissed the fuck off that YOU MISREAD my comment on Janet's blog.

I FUCKING HATE NICKELBACK.

I AM THE ONE THAT TOLD HER TO STOP LISTENING THAT PSEUDO-MUSICAL-CRAP.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE LITERATE.

I FUCKING CALLED YOU AN EXCELLENT WRITER AND ASTUTE READER YESTERDAY.

WHAT.

THE.

FUCK.

I'll comment appropriately after Casey apologizes for misreading.

JillWrites said...

And just in case you need the link, here it is. If you read carefully, you will notice that *I* called them Satan. It was -J, that musical illiterate, that actually recommended that shite.

Grad School Reject said...

We the management do not offer apologies or retractions. That would imply that we were wrong and that you were right, and more importantly that we cared about a thing like accuracy. If you have been sold on things like "apologies" or "responsibility" it is clear that you have been listening to Nickelback for far too long.

Casey said...

These Raveonettes will get a look from me. I'm a little worried that if they play in Bb they might be a bunch of band dorks playing clarinets and shit. By that, I can not abide.

Now My Morning Jacket, that's music.

As for Jill, I have to agree with GSR. I apologize that you're wrong.

heather said...

ok, i was gonna say tool but i've been beaten to the punch on that.

and for the record. i ~love~ nickleback. i don't require that all of my music be relevant, intelligent or even coherent. i'm not at all times so why should the music i choose as the soundtrack to my life be? sometimes a bit of irrelevancy goes a long way in making life enjoyable.

Megarita said...

Gotta second Claven on the Morning Jacket. But I need to say that The White Stripes, when they work, are fabulous. There.

Rock Hammer said...

No. They are not. You are wrong. So there.

cs said...

I'm listening to the new White Stripes right now. It is awesome. It certainly kicks the aptly named Queens of the STONE AGE in the ass.

Grad School Reject said...

Cuff - I was hoping you would chime in on the music. I bought the new White Stripes today. I usually need three listens to an album before I can decide how I feel, but the first listen felt pretty good.

Casey said...

What the hell is wrong with you people?

Anonymous said...

Look!!!! We're a band that wears the same colors, has no bassist, and has a girl drummer! We're super-cool!!!! Right??!!

Just because we play the same five songs (the only popular ones of which included a phantom bass player who must wear a helmet on the bus) over and over on every album doesn't mean we suck, right? Right? I'm jack white, I'm going to cry if you don't like me!!!!!!

;)

Not really. I really will cry. :.(

OMG!!!!!!

mysterygirl! said...

I like Arcade Fire and Dave Grohl. I like candy and soda.

I also like The White Stripes.

Rock Hammer said...

You are obviously wanting to start a music related nerdwar, MG!. You are not ready for that, I assure you.

Janet said...

I'll have you know I only listen to Nickelback after my ipod has ran out of bands that keep my legs moving when I'm running.

So. There. ;)

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